WHO SAID ALL THE GOOD ONES ARE TAKEN?

Friends tell you not to settle, that if you wait long enough, Mr. Right will come along. But what if he doesn't? Feeling a little desperate, you give online dating a try. After all, the Internet should be able to fix you up with someone who shares the same interests as you, (or at least claims to for the sole purpose of getting laid.) Meanwhile, you have hit it off with one guy in particular and have even spoken over the phone. By now, you're picturing the perfect date, so you decide to meet in person. Instead of meeting you halfway, he asks you to drive across the state because his car is in the shop. At this point, you would drive across the country if you had to. Full of wonderful expectations, you arrive at the restaurant where he is waiting for you. Judging by the expression on his face, he is rather pleased with your appearance. You, on the other hand, are a little put off because his online photo must have been taken several years back, when he still had all of his teeth, (a deal breaker for sure.) You order the cheapest thing on the menu so as not to feel obligated. Suddenly, the two of you find yourselves at a loss for words, (hard to believe since you never ran out of topics in your e-mails back and forth to one another.) When it's time to go, he walks you to your car. You try to put as much distance between him as you can by jumping in your car and closing the door. You do, however, make the mistake of rolling your window down. This gives him  the opportunity he's looking for. He bends over and leans into you for the "goodnight kiss." You back away and begin coughing and continue coughing when he asks you if he can call you again. You tell him no and then explain to him why you can't give him a ride home either.